Friday, May 22, 2009

A Bad Hair Day?

I can not find my camera at this very moment to take a picture, but I have to blog about what I'm feeling right now. I thought my hair is pretty cute today. I'm 5 months into my hair being loc'd so it definitely doesn't like braids anymore, well at least up close they don't. So just in a general conversation with my co-worker and the HR manager I told them this question that was sent to me in an email by a friend that I thought was funny and interesting. The email read: "If you saw me in the back of a police car, what would you think I was arrested for?" I thought the email was funny and interesting because it gives you insight on what the people you have asked think about you or what they believe you are capable of doing. Well back to the co-worker and the HR manager--So I say to them, "You won't believe what crimes my friends came up with." And one of them said, "What, having a bad hair day." WHAT!! EXCUSE ME?

I laughed a little (I think laughter is a defense mechanism for me) thinking to myself, 'did this person just say that?'
How do they know I won't blow up in their face? How do they know I won't be offended? How do they know? Well who was it that said it? Surely not the co-worker while the HR manager was standing right there. This potentially could lead to me filling a complaint because the comment was aimed at my dreadlocked hair. Oh, no not the co-worker. You would think certainly not the HR manager. Again that comment was made about my dreadlocked hair. **Answer and pic tomorrow.**

You know what makes me even more upset. ME. When the comment was made, I immediately became defensive and self-conscious of my hair. I began to try to smooth it down in some way. I excused myself from their company and starting looking in every window and mirror I passed by to see what was bad about the way my hair looked. How could this be? I asked myself. How could I walk in this morning to work feeling pretty durn cute and in a matter of hours think there was something wrong with my hair? I let what people thought of me change my whole attitude of MYSELF. Oh, this is a wrong that must be made right, right now! I got to my car, and looked in my mirror once more. I said to myself, You betta shake this mess off! You said you looked good today and dag nabbit YOU DO! If others can't get wit that, then suga they are blind. This is YOUR hair at it's finest. Don't you EVAH let me catch you changing your attitude about how beautiful you are base on someone else's comment, opinion, question, or thought. You are a Queen and should be respected as such, but only after you believe that and command it. Chile, they betta watch out for you, because next time they poke at you they may draw back nubs.

~~Whew, I felt better. I felt empowered.

Soon after that, a vendor walked up to my desk and said "I absolutely love you hair"


msfullroller said...

I'm glad you had that talk with yourself because yes you are beautiful just the way you are and your hair is banging sis! They just mad 'cause your hair looks better than their's. lol

brunsli said...

Oh! You are too funny. I could totally see myself writing the same post.

Are you sure it was an insult? Maybe they like your hair, so the thought of your hair not looking good is an offense to them. But you know them better than I do...

I know how you feel, at the relaxed ends/bunchy/what do I do? stage. You know you will outgrow it -- quite literally!